Ziay!

Nichole 1979

My ex and I have been seperated for 6 months. In that time, he has went back and forth between me and my ex best friend(the reason why we are not toghether).He has also not wanted to have much to do with our daughter who is 3 years old. I have accepted the fact that I have wasted 8 years of my life on a man who wasn't worth it, but should my daughter suffer and not have her father in her life?

nan_seat

I would not FORCE the relationship between your ex and your daughter. I would try to facilitate it, but you can't make the relationship exist.

If I were you, I'd try to facilitate it by setting aside time for them to get together. Help facilitate her birthdays and special days with him, by discussing them in advance with him. (Like "Christmas is coming up, do you want to spend Christmas Eve or Christmas Day with your daughter". This is obviously MORE than you OWE him (you shouldn't be his gift-reminder service), but sometimes we need to go past the half-way point to be a good parent.

In time, your daughter will formulate her own opinion of her father. You want that to be her opinion, not yours. Sometimes the worst thing a kid can think is that they are the child of a jerk - it could make your daughter feel inferior in some way.

So be the bigger person. The best thing you can do for your daughter is to be the best, most accommodating person possible. As they say, "Love your enemies" (I modify that saying: "Love your enemies; it will really tick them off, and make them wonder what you're up to.")